I have always been a very strong-willed child and with that came many arguments and conflicts with my parents and siblings. Oftentimes my ornery ways and my smart mouth would get me into trouble and I would have to pay the consequences for my inappropriate actions. That consequences often consisted of a warning, which if not heeded ended up turning into a spanking or a grounding from something I treasured, like phone privileges or friends coming over or even skating on Friday or Saturday nights. But I’m thankful for my parents who did discipline me, so I just want to say “spanks a lot.”
Over my 18 years of rearing, my derrière has had more than its fair share of spankings. In fact, I can still remember a spanking I received when I was about 2 and half years old. My family lived in Yukon, OK back then and my mom would walk my brothers to school each day and of course I tagged along and would cry when I didn’t get to go to class with them. Oftentimes though on the walk back home, we would stop at the 7-Eleven and get a pop and some penny candy or gum. So to say I knew the routine and the reward would be an understatement.
However, one sunny summer day, while my mom and her best friend, Virginia, were having a cup of tea, Jennifer (Virginia’s daughter) and I found some pennies outside in our backyard. That’s when I had the brilliant idea to go get bubblegum from the 7-Eleven. So out the side gate we went, strolling down several blocks, across a major main road and to the store we marched. Why the cashier didn’t question two toddlers buying penny bubblegum is beyond me. Perhaps because we frequented the store throughout the week they assumed my mom was nearby. Needless to say, she was not. However, when they realized we were missing, they jumped in the car and were driving down every street in search of their two babies.
It wasn’t until my mom thought about the store that they came driving up the road just as we came out the door, chomping and chewing our sweet reward. That sweetness quickly turned bittersweet though when my mama came flying out of Virginia’s car, broke off a switch from a tree and proceeded to switch my backside all the way home. Jennifer on the other hand, got a stern talking to by her mother who was a little more subdued than my mother. Why I remember that spanking so well I’m not sure. Maybe it was because I was so proud of myself for getting us there and getting the bubblegum. Who knows? I promise I have had many more memorable moments over the years and danced to the tune of an old fashioned “coming to Jesus” and a switch. Yes, that’s what my parents believed that a good ol’ spanking each day will keep the devil away. So I grew up believing that my parents loved us enough to spank the “hell out” of us because they didn’t want us to literally go through hell on earth for our lack of discipline.
The Bible says in Proverbs 13:24, “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.” We were and still are firm believers of Proverbs 29:15 that states, “A rod and a reprimand impart wisdom, but a child left undisciplined disgraces its mother.” And buddy let me tell you, if we “showed our butts” in public when we got home we got our little fannies whipped. No ands, ifs or “butts” about it.
Amazingly, I grew up to be a responsible and respectful adult. I even had my own children who grew up with corrective discipline from verbal warnings, timeouts, spankings and groundings. And guess what? They also turned out to be responsible and respectful adults.
However, when I look at our upcoming youth today I wonder how they will ever learn that there are consequences to every action if they are never corrected. Like Isaac Newton simply stated that “for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.” During my upbringing I learned that theory quite literally so I don’t understand why so many advocates are against corporal punishment today. And I’m not talking about excessive or abusive corrections. I’m talking about corrective and caring discipline.
However, because of a lack of discipline today, many schools are now struggling with bullying and destructive children that disrupt classrooms and curse their teachers refusing to follow directions. Some even hurt their teachers. Yet we have more students in mental health therapy than ever before and more “mental illness and medication” but all that doesn’t seem to be helping them. In fact, a lot of the medications actually harm them. Yet we keep our pill-pushing drug companies’ pockets full all in the name of mental health?
Advocates against corporal punishment say legislators have been given “every opportunity to do the right thing” but according to my faith the right thing to do is to “spare not the rod.” They also believe we want to deliberately inflict physical pain on our children by hitting, paddling, spanking, slapping or using any other physical force as a means of discipline, which is ridiculous. I’m not punching my kid in the gut or the face. I’m swatting their behinds so their brains will register that whatever they did to get that spanking was unacceptable.
Because I’d rather spank them while they are young and teach them right and wrong, than visit them in prison because they thought their comfort and convenience came with no consequences.
Personally I want to puke every time professionals claim that spanking a child is traumatizing, harmful and ineffective. Is it really? Because I believe my parents spanking and redirecting me kept me from prison and I believe it’s also kept my children out of the juvenile system that is running over today.
I think as a society we have become too comfortable with allowing children to do what they want to do and then they conveniently face no consequence time after time until we have created a bigger problem. Now we have self-serving children who only worry about themselves. This group of individuals lack interest in their education and are more involved in substance abuse, sexual activity and destructive ways.
They are being fed the lies that they have more depression and anxiety than any other human on this planet. But let me tell you, being a parent is not for the faint of heart. Once you have children it’s never about your comfort or convenience again. Children will test your limits but trust me, your child doesn’t need you to be their best friend; they need you to be their parent.
The truth is often uncomfortable, but the truth is what we all need and we all need discipline in our lives. The Bible says “Train up a child in the way they should go and when they are old, they will not depart from it.”
I agree our schools should be a safe place for every child, but they should also be a safe place for every teacher and administrator. I do not condone physical violence or beating children into submission. However, I do believe His Word is true and sometimes the truth hurts, like the fact sometimes a spanking is exactly what a child needs. Unfortunately, there are some adults that must have missed the real understanding of corrective discipline. But I choose to make sure my children contribute to society in a positive way and I believe my disciplinary actions have more than proved to be effective in keeping them on the straight and narrow path. No we are not trying to damage our children, but we are trying to discipline them in love.
The last scripture I leave you is a charge to parents in Ephesians 6:4 that says “Fathers (I’ll insert mother too) provoke not your children to wrath: instead bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” I’m proud to have followed in my parents’ footsteps and pray I have also led my children in ways that are right and pleasing to the Lord. So spanks a lot, mom. You’ve made me the mom I am today.
